Herds and Words

A herd of buffalo was running across the open prairie, when suddenly the lead buffalo stopped suddenly. "What's wrong? What's wrong!?," all the buffalo called out. He replied, "I just thought I heard a discouraging word."

[The punchline of this joke comes from a timeless song called "Home on the Range" that has become the state song of Kansas. The chorus is printed below. For more words, click here.]

Home, home on the range,
Where the deer and the antelope play,
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word,
And the skies are not cloudy all day.

(Dick Dye)

The Compliment

"I'm so nervous about my first date. What can I say?"
"You just have to find something to compliment her about so that she won't be nervous."
"Okay, I'll try."

(After the date...)
"So, how did it go?"
"It went alright..."
"So, what happened? Did you compliment her like I said?"
"Yeah...."
"Well, what did you say?"
"I said: 'For a fat girl, you don't sweat much!'"

(from Dick Dye--again!)

It Helps a Bit...

"Yep, I drink about 17 cups of coffee a day."
"Boy, doesn't that keep you awake?"
"Well, it helps a little bit during the day..."

(heard tonight from the lips of Dick Dye, missionary to Mexico since 1970)